Monty and Morgion 052: Labyrinth Part 2


04Jul03 (Monthenor): Morgion's problems with Apple Support are by now the stuff of legend. I had always imagined that Apple had a more caring and competent attitude towards their zealots customers, like the friendliness of Gateway coupled with decent computers. That beautiful dream is now shattered. As Morgion has so thoroughly demonstrated, both in his Powerbook woes and his image extravaganza on Wednesday, Apple's new guiding philosophy seems to be, "The customer would always be right, except they don't understand our design."

Terminator party was a hit, except for the T2 DVD skipping during some crucial character development. The liquid metal drinks were almost perfect, but I couldn't find a way to make them shiny in time. They were, however, very much grey. Vanilla vodka + vanilla ice cream + 1 drop of black food coloring = tasty grey drink.

I really like Zhufti. I almost hope Morgion has more Apple problems so I can use him again.

Everyone is crazy, except me. Or something.
Morgion // 07.04.03 - 13.22

Thanks, Monthenor, for sympathizing with my pain. I'll make sure to express my gratitude with a glittery chainsaw!

My nerves really can't take more of this Independence Day revelry… every few minutes it sounds like a mortar shell is going off just down the block. I'm not whining about bottle rockets or Black Cats… freaking mortars. Just ask ask Monty.

Now for the insanity. Princess Di, in a comic book, as a mutant. Also, a technological advancement fit for (Belated) Rise of the Machines Day: a printer that makes you move it across the page. I'm sensing a conspiracy between the subjugated classes of Silicon and Pulp that will no doubt end in the collapse of modern civilization. Oh well, it had a reasonably good run, with some notable exceptions.

Virtual sex == good. Mail-order Terminatrix == bad.
Morgion // 07.05.03 - 11.17

Unless, you know, you're into that kinda thing. And you have really good health insurance, because you'll need it. Along with some new internal organs (perhaps bionic?) and a prosthetic limb or two.

T3 was superb. Lots of action, a chick with a plasma cannon for an arm, a decent amount of character development (although Nick Stahl could have used a bit more acting development; he hasn't grown much since Disturbing Behaviorexcept the stubble)—and it confirmed a flaw that I detected in the T-800's programming during our Terminator party: They can't resist sunglasses. I theorized that if you could get a Terminator into a Sunglass Hut—without him blowing it up first—he'd be distracted for hours.

In T1, the Terminator used freaking huge 80's Gargoyles sunglasses (which look a lot like Monty's driving shades *snicker*) to conceal his eye damage. In T2, after he got his biker getup, he just had to swipe a pair of shades. In T3, there's a scene where he's methodically stocking up on junk food at a convenience store (I'm sure his database told him, "Humans are fueled by sugar and cream filling.").

Then, he comes to a rack of cheap sunglasses… and stops cold. At least 3 seconds on screen, but probably a minute or two total as he assessed the Badass Coefficient of each pair and calculated how compatible it would be with his outfit and facial geometry.

After T3, we had some stellar grilling, dill dip, and magical beans from heaven at Atlas' place. And liquor, so much liquor. Which made the National Spelling Bee on ESPN at 2300 way more fun than it would have normally been. Always refreshing to see that there are people geekier than you; it's a real self-esteem builder.

05Jul03 (Monthenor): Oh, so much alcohol...*rubs head*. I'm not sure if I've ever been so drunk, but I'm pretty sure that spelling bees on ESPN2 are not going to become a habit.

Anyway, I wanted to tell you about the other good movie we saw this week. Sinbad was pretty awesome. Dreamworks is definitely in a position to overthrow Disney as the animation purveyor of choice, assuming that Disney doesn't buy them out or sue them or something. It's clear by this point that Disney itself is unable to create anything orignal or fresh, and are spending most of their time churning out unneeded sequel after unneeded sequel.

So go see Sinbad, if only because it's not Disney. It captures the animation and sweeping style of classics like Beauty and the Beast or Lion King, but without the reliance on cheesy musical numbers. In it's place we have huge computerized obstacles and Michelle Pfeiffer's sexiest performance since Catwoman. In fact, I would compare it to another non-Disney powerhouse, Titan A.E.. Both rely on a blend of traditional animation and CG, both have a rather silly and childish love story shoehorned in, and both are backed by a sweet soundtrack that nevertheless does NOT interrupt the movie with choreographed dance sequences. Also, we saw it at 8:40 PM on a Wednesday, which translates to private screening!! Woohoo!