29Apr03 (Monthenor): Wai is victorious! And now for something completely different...

Dixie Chicks lose fan base; millions couldn't give a rat's ass.
05.01.03 (Morgion)

First, a correction. In a previous episode of GerbilMechs, I made an erroneous citation: MJ / Atlas / WhateverHisHandleIsNow was actually the one who uttered "She has a cult following! Cult following!"; apparently Monty crossed into my field of vision while MJ was exclaiming, and my File Monkey got confused and started throwing file folders all over the place.

The "cult following" comment refers to the variegated (your roots are showing again, dear) Sarah Michelle Gellar (look at her IMDB headshot!) and her futile attempt at a movie career. You get Cruel Intentions, hon, and nothing else good. Although, if you stayed in a popular TV series, you could continue to do MTV Movie Awards shows; that would be very acceptable.

By the way, did you notice SMG sounded a bit hoarse on Tuesday's Buffy? Must have been from too much screaming about how unappreciated she is.

In other news, eBay hooligans are trying to supplement their income: X2 promotional posters were stolen from bus stops in 15 cities. The claimed value is $40 each… maybe the things are interwoven with gold thread. Also, vandals and thieves struck at the set of Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban. Oh no! What was destroyed? Cauldrons, the cloak of invisibility, the chance that Chris Columbus will ever direct a Harry Potter movie again (oh please)? Nay: "polystyrene pumpkins and plaster rocks". Oh, the criminal masterminds strike such fear in my heart.

Who here liked The Crow; show of hands, please. Good! Now, everyone who liked the sequels (including the version of The Crow 3 Rob Zombie would have done), please jump out of a window. At least a 10-story one, please. Now, if there are any of you sequel-lovers left, we shall punish… um, treat you with the impending Crow 4, staring David Boreanaz. Thankfully, he's not the Crow himself… he's just trying to become an immortal demon. I'm glad Boreanaz is pushing his bounds and becoming a more diverse actor.

This week will end well; matinee of X-Men 2 tomorrow, and then we'll all be dripping with anticipation of The Matrix Reloaded. Um, drooling, I mean drooling.

On a completely unrelated note, start up your favorite player of legitimate electronic music, grab a copy of Cake - The Distance… um, legitimately… and sing along with the review of Mouse Distance Measurer 1.8.